I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
