Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
