Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
that is very illegal...i love you.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize