we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
