Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
