Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
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