what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
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