It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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