I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
