Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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