they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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