I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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