they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
