this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
