Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
