Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize