I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
