just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize