I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
