Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
