it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
