Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I have grass duct taped all over my body
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
