is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
