is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
