You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize