Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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