Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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