We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize