be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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