Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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