It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
