In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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