her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
