WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
my shit smells like andre
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
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