last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
You smell like stripper and shame
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
