he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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