Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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