girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Never joke about your clitoris.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
