Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
