all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
