I wanna bring you to show and tell
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You ate ashes out of my bong
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