i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
