Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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