Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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