VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize