what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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