everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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