My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i believe in u and ur pee
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize