there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Boobs are out for the taking
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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