It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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